I was born in the late sixties in a family of famous authors who were pagans and homosexuals. My mother was Marion Zimmer Bradley, and my father was Walter Breen. Together they wrote more than 100 books: my mother wrote science fiction and fantasy, and my father wrote books on numismatics: he was an expert on coins.

Regrettable information about what they did to me is available in public records. I can only say that both parents wanted me to be homosexual and terrified of my femininity. My mother molested me from 3 to 12 years. My first recollection that my father did something especially violent with me dates back to the age of five. Yes, he raped me. I do not like to remember this. If you want to know about his tricks with little girls and you have very strong nerves, you can search the Internet for “Breendoggle” - a scandal that ALMOST knocked him out of science fiction fandom.

He was deeply disgusted with my gender despite his many relationships with women and female victims. He explicitly told me that no man would ever want me, because all the men are secretly gay who simply cannot accept their “natural homosexuality”. Therefore, I learned to behave like a man and walk without moving my hips. You can still see traces of my forced rejection of femininity, manifested in the absolute intransigence, frankness and choice of profession as a theater director for most of my life. However, the plus of my frankness is the refusal to accept the suggestions that "deep down I am a boy born in the body of a girl." Not! I am a girl, hated because she is a girl who tried hard to be the "boy" they wanted.

I will only say that I was not their only victim, no matter what gender. I grew up watching my father have “romances” (in his imagination) with boys who always ended in disappointment, because they only wanted food and money for sex, to which he subjected them, but did not want him (naturally) . When I was 10 years old, after the first unsuccessful suicide attempt, I began to actively try to leave home. In 13 years, I began to intervene in what was happening, telling my mother and her friend that my father was sleeping with one boy. Instead of calling the police, as every sensible person would do, they simply sent their father to their apartment, and they themselves moved to our family home.

Naturally, everything just got worse. For some time I slept on the couch in the house of my friends, but this could not go on forever. As expected, where my father was, there were teenage boys, orgies, drugs, and not a lot of food, although I can’t say that I was hungry after my mother’s books started selling well. As a teenager, I lived wherever I could, and with college I returned to my father.

Once he brought an eleven-year-old boy who, with the permission of his mother, was supposed to stay with us for a week, which terrified me. I made sure that he had his own room and bedding. When I saw how my father, holding him upside down, kisses him in all places, and there is a pornographic magazine nearby, I called my consultant, who agreed to call the police in advance if I saw something like that, and my father was arrested. For this crime he was given three years probation. Nevertheless, rumors spread, and the person who rented his apartment in Los Angeles realized that his son was just at such an age that he could become his victim. He began to ask questions and this led to my father getting 13 charges under 288 article of the California Criminal Code, paragraphs A, B, C and D. (I’ll just say that these are different types of violent sexual crimes that should not be committed with whom, not to mention the child!)

I have never tried to achieve justice for myself, because in my moral structure I was the protector of others, and I really loved my father. Although I thought I could forgive him for what he had done to me, I did not in any way believe that you could forgive him for what he had done to someone else, especially since his last victim was not a “prostitute” ", But an innocent child who suffered very much.

As expected, although my mother and my “stepmother” knew perfectly well about my father’s crimes, they didn’t believe me until he was found guilty and discredited me as a “hysterical girl”. Again, most of the description of what happened can be found in public records, but the cold indifference of my mother and the pretentiousness of my stepmother for a complete lack of responsibility were disgusting. It is enough that she admitted that she knew about his intentions. When my mother was accused of my molestation, she stated that "children have no erogenous zones." She did not even bother to deny having tied me to a chair and threatened to pluck my teeth with pliers.

My father died in prison in 1993 after my first application to 1989. It should be noted that this was not his first crime - his first arrest was in 1948, when he was 18 years old. He was a serial rapist on whose account there were many, many victims (I could call 22 in the police), but my mother was much worse. She was very cruel and completely out of her mind when it came to sexuality. Not only I became her victim, and not just girls.

In any case, since the truth came to light, pedophilic topics in her books have become apparent to many of her fans. My father, under the pseudonym JZ Eglinton, once wrote with her editorial assistance a book for the apologetics of sex between adults and children under the name Greek Love. Suddenly no one doubted what was so obvious to me all this time. People burned their copies of her books because they did not want to sell them and make money on her evil.

Just as my family rallied to protect my father, most recently she again closed ranks around a relative accused of molesting the children of her former boy lover, whom he considers his “grandchildren,” since he “adopted” her boy- lover as a "son." Yes, I know it is so disgusting that it is difficult to read. I was marginalized again, they called me “crazy” and “hysterical”. Like the last time I turned in my father to the police, I moved away from my family. I wrote a statement and my students did the same, who were horrified by what he said about his "grandchildren."

It should be noted here that “boy lovers” do not at all consider their actions “molesting”. They consider this sex by mutual agreement and any objections will be overcome by orgasms, which, in their opinion, they can deliver. It is the shame of these orgasms that makes the male victims remain silent and convinces them that they “must be gay” (regardless of subsequent heterosexual marriages and children).

The actual beliefs of my parents were as follows: every person is homosexual in nature, but the heterosexual way of society disconnects them from this and therefore limits them. Early sex arouses in people a desire to have sex with everyone, and this will help them become “themselves,” eliminate homophobia and lead to the onset of utopia. It will also destroy the hated nuclear family with its paternalism, sexism, ageism (yes, it’s important for pedophiles) and all other “isms”. If a sufficient number of children are sexualized at an early age, homosexuality will suddenly become “normal” and generally accepted, and old-fashioned ideas of fidelity will disappear. Since sex is a natural and integral part of any relationship, the barriers between people will disappear and utopia will come, while the “heterosexual culture” awaits the fate of dinosaurs. As my mother said, “they’re driven into the head of the children that they don’t want sex.”

Yes, the stupidity of this thesis is limitless, and its actual consequences are forty-year-old people undergoing trauma therapy for sexual violence, a huge number of suicides and the ruined life of almost every one of them.

Between writing allegations of sexual abuse by my father and my relative, I received a bachelor's degree in music and made a career as a wedding harpist and singer. Then I got married and gave birth to children, received a master's degree in music. Since the 2007 year, I have been mainly engaged in staging operas, teaching singing and playing the harp. I also recorded an album of Celtic music.

After my decision to break off relations with my family, I gradually began to realize that perhaps homosexuality was indeed a problem. Naturally, I was raised in the spirit of complete tolerance. A few years ago I read Dr. Satinover, who claims that “gays” are mostly pansexual (that is, they are not limited to one partner, but prefer sex with any person, any age and any gender), and he reasonably considers this a moral and ethical problem rather than “sexual orientation.”

For me, my research on homosexuality was an almost bashful secret: I dared to think the unthinkable. After all, homosexuality has always been presented to me as a natural state. They called me “disconnected” and “prude” because, despite my mother’s persuasion to “try differently” and “how do you know that you are straight?”, I simply could not accept that I was homosexual.

Thanks to my many years of experience with the BDSM community, I am convinced that homosexuality is a consequence of IMPRINTING, as well as BDSM fantasies. The long practice of sadomasochistic fantasies becomes sexually arousing. Similarly with homosexuality. However, based on what I saw, it does not bring healing. My mother became a lesbian because she was raped by her father. My father was corrupted by a priest and considered this the only love he had ever known. I can’t count how many lesbians I know who simply hate men or who have been raped and now cannot think of sex with a man. There are very few homosexual people. There are many more who have relationships with people of BOTH sexes, as my parents and other relatives did.

Homosexuality is actually a problem. The belief that any sex at any time will somehow fix the problems and not create them is a problem. The main difference between “gay culture” and heterosexual culture is the belief that early sex is good and useful, as well as strong knowledge (do not be mistaken for a second that they do not know this), that the only way to create another homosexual is to give the boy sexual experience BEFORE it will be “spoiled” by the attraction to the girl.

Therefore, I began to oppose gay marriage, thus losing most of my supporters. In the end, following their deep-rooted ethical positions and trying to create a utopia in accordance with a rather silly fantasy, they wanted to see crazy parents in my parents, not homosexuals. They have no desire to accept the possibility that homosexuality can actually destroy the lives of children and even adults who do not want to free themselves from its slavery.

If you think I'm wrong, this is your right, but beware of the huge number of cases of sexual abuse and transgenderism that arise from these homosexual “marriages”. Already, statistics on sexual violence among gay children are astronomically high compared to heterosexual children: https://downloads.frc.org/EF/EF13I75.pdf.

Naturally, my prospect is very inconvenient for the liberal people with whom I grew up: I am “allowed” to be a victim of molestation by both parents, I am “allowed” to be a victim of terrifying violence, but I am FORBIDDEN to blame their homosexuality and consider it the reason for their absolute willingness to accept any kind sex between anyone.

But that won’t stop me. I will continue to talk. I was silent for too long. Gay marriage is nothing more than a way of raising children in the image and likeness of their “parents,” and after 10 – 30 years, survivors will begin to speak.

In the meantime, I will do it.

Moira Greyland

---

The most rigorous and methodologically sound study found numerous and significant differences between children raised by homosexual parents, compared with children raised by their married mother and father. Results for homosexual children were rated as “suboptimal” in almost every category. Studies using different methodologies among non-heterosexual individuals have consistently identified a higher risk of child abuse, including emotional, physical and sexual abuse. More details: https://vk.com/wall-153252740_164

The 2014 APA Sexuality and Psychology Handbook confirms the existence of an “associative or potentially causal relationship” between homosexuality and early sexual abuse, especially for men. More details in English: https://www.tremr.com/Duck-Rabbit/homosexual-orientation-and-reporting-childhood-sexual-abuse-the-link-is-clear-but-does-correlation-indicate-causation

A study on the prevention of child abuse by Abel and Harlow, coupled with the latest CDC statistics on sexual orientation (NHIS 2014), showed that child molesters in sexual minorities are 19 times more than among heterosexual people.